In this series of Thoughts By My Fellow Man I have highlighted and made a mental note to tell others of the wisdom and common sense being spewed forth from "average" individuals. To often we read quotes from people dead and gone and while their view points are needed and should be used as reminders to the younger generation I will say this; there are people that we choose to walk by everyday that have built in reservoirs of knowledge and useful information. I can remember the first time I heard, Saul Williams, Talk To Strangers I was deeply moved by the song because I have always talked to complete strangers. In fact, whenever I am late or take longer than what is necessary my family will say, "She's talking to somebody." It doesn't matter. It one of the way I stay sane in this insane world.
Today's thoughts is by Khadija one of my most favorite bloggers. You can check her out here. http://muslimbushido.blogspot.com/
She was responding to a posting about why it is important for black women to reconsider the support we give to most damaged beyond repair black men. With that being said, I am an advocate for interracial relationships. Black women MUST widen their dating pools at as soon as possible. If you would like to read her response in it's entirety, please do so by going here.
http://www.blackfemaleinterracialmarriage.com/2008/10/living-well-not.html
Thoughts by our Fellow Man
"Once somebody harms a person, that person is not obligated to concern themselves with "redeeming" the aggressor. Or concern themselves with whether or not the attacker is redeemable. This sort of thinking is anti-self-preservation."
We women have been pretty well beaten down and stepped on by almost everyone. It's damn near difficult to get any respect --including other females. I've made a promise to myself to watch how I treat and speak about other women especially black women. Immediately I found myself gasping for air whenever I made a remark about a situation because rarely did I step into it acknowledging that I was dealing with another female spirit. The only thing I saw was a issue, and that made me really unsympathetic towards them. So, the first thing I do is make sure I openly acknowledge the gender, then I deal with the situation and usually this causes me to be flexible in my thinking. I don't want to hurt or contribute to the pain of other black women in any way.
Khadija's comment is for any women who has ever been abused or violated by a person. It demands me to ask of myself and for you to ask of yourself, what is self preservation?
Webster's Dictionary has this definition:
Main Entry:
self–pres·er·va·tion
Pronunciation:
\-ˌpre-zər-ˈvā-shən\
Function:
noun
Date:
circa 1614
1 : preservation of oneself from destruction or harm
2 : a natural or instinctive tendency to act so as to preserve one's own existence
What must I do to preserve myself from the harm being inflicted by other people? Does a lion go back to the scene of battle and concern himself with whether he killed the hyena? Noooo! In my opinion, this care & concern for the aggressor is deeply ingrained in religion. But at the same time there are many parts of the bible that tells you a "eye for a eye."
For me this feeling of no longer feeling sorry for those whom have preyed on me as a child, is something new for me. I just adapted this thinking in the last week or so, and it shows, I admit. I'm a newbie but I understand the principle so well, I feel like on oldie. I am now like a wild animal, I have no remorse for those who try to do me harm. I will not tolerate it, neither should you.
